Saturday, March 8, 2008

The Power Of Words

Words can hurt. Words can build up and words can destroy. So let us be careful with what we say and how we say it. There are words that cut deep into one's soul and no amount of apologies can rectify the hurt that was done.

We may feel good when we give someone a piece of our mind, but though we may be relieved from the release of an intense emotion, we may have left someone devastated and with a broken spirit. Can we live with that?

Sometimes words can provoke anger and violence. It is better to hold our tongues when there is nothing good that we can say. As they say, silent waters run deep and a bubbling brook holds no depth.

Gossips, idle talk and back stabbing are some of the worse words that can leave our mouths. They do no good and destroy the reputations of others. Better to keep our peace and hold our tongues in check.

If we must speak, let us speak words of encouragements, words of inspiration, words of love and words that uplift rather than hurt and destroy others. Let us become harbingers of peace and joy to the world. Together with a genuine smile,
gentle words of approbation uplift the spirits and cause considerable joy and exuberance to those we come in contact with.

As the song says, "did we fill the world with love our whole life through."


Arthur said...

Hi Mel, that's right. It even happens to me, but no longer. When I'm full of anger, I (accidentally) not only say, but also do something to harms others. But now, I'm managing to blow up my anger in a positive way in order not to harm others.

So now, if I have something good to say, I'll say it, if no, I'll better say nothing.

Thnks for your comments in my dreams.

Big greetings and big hugs

Sweet Dreams, from the bottom of my angerless Heart:

Gusthav said...

Hi Mel, that's a good post. You know, since I'm more easy-going than Arthur, I hardly do or say something to harm others.

You know, I prefer to be funny and full of joy rather than being easy-offended, grumpy or full of anger.

But that doesn't mean I always accept offenses. I just wanna be happy, like today, simply I'm feeling peace.

Greetings and hugs

Nice Day, with my whole soul:

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Hi Arthur,
Anger can be suppressed by focusing on things that make us feel good. It is better to remain silent than talk and hurt somebody else. The hurting remarks that we say today has the nasty habit of returning back to us someday. We sleep with a sound conscience at night if we know that we have not hurt anybody but instead uplifted the life of somebody that day. Thanks for your faithful patronage of my blogs. I truly appreciate that, my young friend. God bless you and your loved ones always.

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Hi Gusthav,
Good for you that you are not easily angered and have a happy disposition. Happy people are good people to be with since they are full of joy and exuberance. As they say, laughter is the best medicine. If only people will learn to laugh at themselves and at all funny situations, our world will be a happier place to live. Thanks for your visit and meaningful comments my young friend. And thanks too for patronizing my blogs. I rally appreciate that. God bless you and your loved ones always.

priscocam said...

Thanks for this nice entry. Yes,it is true,physical pain can be healed but sometimes the verbal pain that we inflict to others will leave a deep mark on others' hearts. I know that i do become angry at times and hurt others with harsh words. But i do realize it and i know that i hurt someone. With this attitude, i need lots of patience and should manage my anger. I am happy i am reading your blogs,they indeed influence my mood!

Emmyrose said...

Hi Bro.Mel,

Thank you so much for constantly commenting on my posts, you really inspire me especially these days when I feel so down. Your words indeed are enlightenment to me and to others. God bless you and your family always.

Noushy Syah said...

Another good posting for heart and soul...thanks Mel.

It is true, that the pen is mightier than the sword!!I absolutely agree with what you said, if we got nothing nice to say,it's better to shut up. However, positive and constructive criticisms are always welcome for improvement.

Have a blessed day and let us take care of our words.Take care Mel.

SeaSpray said...

This is totally how I am with other people. i guard my words because they can last a lifetime. i choose to be an encourager.

I am not perfect but I usually go out of my way to not hurt anyone.

words can tear down or they can speak life. i choose life.

i hope i didn't offend you in my blog awhile ago.

have a beautiful day and i love your blog. :)

*~*Sameera*~* said...

That was so beautiful!As someone had wisely said,"the tongue is not steel yet it cuts".Intentionally or otherwise,we all say words which do more harm than they are actually worth.Better to keep silent at such times and think of the consequences before such words are let out.

Thank you for the very wise post my friend.Have a great week ahead.God Bless You and your family always.

fingertalks said...

that's an awesome post, bro.mel. thank you for reminding me to choose my words wisely. i wrote a letter to my bro. awhile ago..i rechecked and rechecked my letter for the nth time...wondering how he'd feel upon reading it. there were some parts that i deleted. and then deleted still after reading your post.

have a nice day bro.mel.

Aisha said...

Love this post, it is true! There are times when I try to hold my tongue in but sometimes I do get to gossip. It's good to be reminded.

JLee said...

So true, Mel!! We all need this reminder because words do hurt and we can all learn the right way to speak to each other without hurling insults.

Keshi said...

Great post Mel!

Some ppl hv nothing better to do than attack others with words. And its happening even in Blogville. then again, Im not surprised...cos ppl dun change in or outside the net. They will always be who they r.

Words r powerful yes...and some words can hurt us more than a knife can.


Walk Through Money Online Journal said...

This are all true Mel and thats why I am trying so hard to avoid talking to people that can provoke my Frankness, most especially at work. So most of the time I just work rather than talking to people who got nothing much to say but gossips, finding fault, finding imprefections as if they are perfect bla bla bla... I love blogging because this where I can release my thoughts... Informative thoughts that I am sure a lot of people at my work will never appreciate.

Hey Mel, I am glad to see some banners on your blog.. Hmmmm looks like you're realy interested on making money online.. Go !!!!.. As I have been saying, Paid Reviews is addicting and it can hurt your Page Rank and Readers as well. If you do a lot of paid reviews, your readers will start to find your blog boring. I love your blog because it's very inspiring. Try to put Google Adsense first before venturing to Paid Reviews. I have a very strong feeling that your traffic is good enough to give you numbers of clicks and eventually give you good income..

Mississippi Songbird said...

Mel, Thank you for this post..
I really needed this today. I think I shall have to hold my tongue at work
I hope you have a blessed week..
God bless you and your family..

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Hi Priscocam,
Thanks my friend for visiting my blog and for the very inspiring comments. Yes, we have to be very careful with our words because they can do a lifetime of damage. If we look back from our memory bank, we will remember the bitter words that have left such an indelible marks in our souls. Although we may have forgiven the person/s who did that, the pain sometimes linger on for a lifetime if we we're unsuccessful in exorcising (pardon the word) it from our system. Thanks that you appreciate my post but TO GOD BE THE GLORY. God bless you and your loved ones always.

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Hi sis Emmyrose,
You are my friend and my sister in Christ that is why I have learned to empathize with you. Your pain becomes my pain and your sorrows become my sorrows too. I have felt the anguish in your heart but I can only pray to God that He grants you your heart's desires. We can only wait for his perfect time to grant them to you. In the meantime, just bide your time and count your blessings and you will have a very pleasant disposition because of that. Then we realize how God loves us so much. Focus not on your love for God because often times it wanes. Focus more on God's love for us because it is unfathomable and forever. If He did not hesitate to give us His only begotten Son, what else can He withhold from us if we only really ask from Him. My prayers are for you and for Bluebirdy and Chronic Chick who are also suffering from Lupus. But theirs, especially Bluebirdy, are of the severe type that they could no longer do their usual chores. Thank God for everything and your world will change. You are blessed with a good job, a supportive family, probably a new business, and all the travels you can get. What more can you ask from life? Just food for thought my dear friend. God bless you and your loved ones always.

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Hi Noushy,
So nice to see you here always my dear friend. Yes, the pen is mightier than the sword. I always think of all the hurting words I said especially to my loved ones during the times I was not yet born again and I cringed everytime I remembered them. If I could only go back in time and retrieve those ugly words, I would have done so. Harsh words are sometimes products of uncontrolled emotions. If we feel so strongly deep inside , it is but logical that we burst it out. But the damage starts there. Often times, it's just a case of miscommunication but the dagger has been stabbed and the pain has been given. How better it is to give the other person the benefit of the doubt. Too often I have rergretted saying hurting words but alas, the damage has been done and no amount of apologies can ever mend the fractured pieces of one's relationship with the person we hurt. Thanks for coming over and for your insightful comments. God bless you and your loved ones always. Have a great and fancy free day in foggy London my friend..

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Hi Seaspray,
No, I have not been to your blog yet. I will visit it later. It's good that you are very careful with your words. Words are plentiful but in the abundance of words, sometimes we utter unnecessary remarks which could hurt others. It is better to be choosy with words and not to talk much. As they say, more talk- more mistakes, less talk- less mistake, no talk- no mistake. He, he, he, *lol* Sorry for the Injun talk. Don't worry. It takes a lot of heavy words to affect me. Thanks for your visit and encouraging words. God bless you and your loved ones always.

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Hi Sameera,
Oh, you are so beautiful my friend. Why were you hiding your face before? Probably you were awaiting for the best picture you could get before showing it in your profile. He, he, he, *lol* There is always an air of mystery in you my friend, like a fragrant flower that one could smell but could not locate where it is. Lucky is the guy who could locate this flower. Just be choosy my friend and execise your God given wisdom in choosing the man of your dreams. And do not be a sucker for sweet but empty words and expensive gifts. The man of your dreams will give you his heart for a lifetime. You will know him if you meet him because he is your soul mate. I know you are very patient with your words and you will not have any problems with your communication with others. Thanks for coming my beautifl friend. God bless you and your loved ones always.

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Hi Fingertalks,
That is very nice that you carefully proofread your letter to your brother. There is a bigger chance of a miscommunication with written words than with spoken words. Women must be especially careful with their words because sometimes they are born out of their intense feelings or emotions. Words of love are good when plucked from an intense emotion. Not so with words of hurt or pain, we could easily write things that we may regret later on. You have a way with words sister. And I appreciate the wide range of emotions you bring along in posting. You can make a lot of difference in the lives of people you will touch. Thanks for your visit and your inspiring comments. God bless you and your loved always my friend.

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Hi Aisha,
Thanks for coming over and for your comments. Women by nature tend to resort to gossips at times, so do men (sometimes, even more) He, he, he, *lol*. But we can always control our tendency to gossip because it is evil. Gossips have wings and they travel so fast and before we know it, the gossip is blown out of proportion. And gossips are more of character assasination. Who would want to be a murderer of character? As they say, if we have nothing good to say, we better keep our mouths shut. Thanks again. God bless you and your loved ones always.

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Hi Jlee,
It is always a pleasure to see you at my blog. I hope you don't mind if I call you the First Lady of blogging. I have learned to enjoy your hilarious and witty posts before and I was really amazed when you went out of circulation. I will not ask the reason why. I'm just so happy that you are back again. Yes, we have to be very careful with our words, especially those that can really hurt and become nasty. Thanks again for your vist. God bless you and your loved ones

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Hi Keshi,
Thanks for your visit and wonderful comments. I don't think there will be hurting words in bloggerville if only people will be respectful of others. If we receive an offensive remark, we can just shrug it off. To the viewers, they will know who has urbanity and who has not. As I said words are cheap, only the true golden nuggets of words of inspiration and encouragement can uplift a sagging spirit. And that makes a lot of difference in our world. Thanks again and God bless you and your loved ones always.

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Hi Tey,
Regarding frankness, it may be a blind spot my friend. It may be a shield for you to avoid being hurt, but in the process, you might be isolating yourself. Try to find out the reason for your frankness and invite inputs from trusted friends. Extra sensitivity can be a heavy burden on the interpersonal relationship of a person. Regarding the banners, yes I am putting them in preparation for commercial ads later on. I really have to do my part to augment our income and this is the only thing that I can do since I am practically homebound now because of my many illnesses. Your posts in your blog have given me very valuable inputs that I will surely use as I go along in commercial blogging. Thanks for your visit my friend and please don't be so onion skinned.He, he, he *lol* God bless you and your loved ones always.

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Hi Stephanie,
Yes, we all need to hold our tongues in check so that we will not unnecessarily use it to hurt others.
We can use it to bless others. Thanks for your visit and comments. God bless you and your loved ones always.

heiresschild said...

hi Mel, when i saw your title, i immediately thought of the scripture, "death & life are in the power of the tongue & they who indulge in it shall eat the fruit of it (for death or life).

we had this saying when i was growing up: "sticks & stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me." my daughter said that's not true, words can and do hurt.

the Bible says to be slow to speak, quick to hear, and slow to anger. if we'd all only practice this...... the Holy Spirit within us leads and guides us, even to when to keep our mouths shut; we just have to heed His warning. good post!

love your new blog look! peace & blessings to you and your family Mel!

Elween said...

words are like a fragrant rose, saturating wonderful scents around us, making us feel good. words are like a double-edged sword, thrusting through human heart's--with or without purpose. So what is 'words' characteristic? that based what you hold -- a stick of fragrant rose, or a murderous double-edged sword.

thanks for the inspiration, Mel.:)

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Hi Heiresschild,
Thanks for your visit and your very inspired comments. Yes, James said that the tongue is a small part of our body but it is so dangerous that it can cause a fire. Yes, he who holds his tongue shall have peace but he who uses his tongue so much will always be in trouble. Thanks for appreciating the new additions to my blog. I put them in preparation to receiving some commercial ads later on so that I can augment the meager finances of my family. That's the only thing that I can do since I am practically homebound now because of my illnesses. Thanks for your visit and comments. God bless you and your family always.

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Hi Elween,
Wow, those are wonderful pieces of inspired poetry. I did not know that you can be so poetic my friend. I suggest you write poems and short stories in your blog. I think you have the making of a great literary figure. Thanks for visiting my blog my young friend. I hope you don't have any more trouble in Malaysia right now. He, he, he, *lol* God bless you and all your loved ones always.

Mona said...

Words are tools given to us. It is up to us how we use them .

If we have nothing good to say, then we should not say anything at all!

krystyna said...

Thanks Mel,
words have a big power,
with words we can heal
or we can kill.
I wrote very similar post here:

I put your link to this post at my

c e e d y said...

Words are like arrows that leave the bow...once released they do not come back...

such an appropriate time - just today I erronously distressed a fellow blogger - was completly harmless....and now a big lesson learnt

Thank you again

orange said...

a very timely read for me. Just a while ago, i was watching the famous answer of the newly crowned Ms Philippines World. In the comments, most that I read was about words of discouragement and disappointment. I have my own opinion but I'd rather not say it because I know it's not something good and I would hurt her even if she doesn't know.
I was struck by your message, if we speak, speak words of encouragement and inspiration.


*~*Sameera*~* said...

Hey Mel!Thanks for the compliment :)

I had put up my pic earlier too,it was an older one.It is there in the previous comments,you can see.This is a recent one,that's all.As for my Soulmate,I already have found him,or rather he has found me!I had told you this before in reply to some of your comments and it is indeed he who I think about when I write all my posts related to love.

Hope you doing well my friend.God Bless You always.

Unbalanced Libra said...

Wonderful entry. Words are very powerful.

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Hi Mona,
Yes, I agree with you. If we have nothing good to say, it is better to shut up. Then, we don't expend wasteful energy. Thanks for your valuable point of view. God bless you and your loved ones always.

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Hi Krystyna,
I agree with you 100%. Words can kill or heal depending on the contents. Words that hurt and maim another person's soul are words that will haunt the giver till the day he dies. It is really better to hold our peace than rant off unnecessarily and in the process unknowingly hurt another soul. Thanks for your visit and wonderful comments my friend. God bless you and your loved ones always.

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Hi Ceedy,
Yes, words are like arrows shot in one's bow. Once you release it there is no longer any way to retrieve it. But there is still a way to mitigate its effects. We just have to apologize and say we're sorry for the hurting words. Our expression of humility and genuine goodwill will surely melt the hardest of hearts. But alas, the enemy of a sincere apology is one's pride. Pride is an over estimation of our self worth and the enemy of our real progress in life. Thanks for your visit and meaningful comments. I hope you made peace with the blogger whom you unwittingly hurt. You never lose anything by saying you're sorry. On the other hand, you will gain a lifetime friend by doing it.
God bless you and your loved ones always.

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Hi Orange,
Thanks for your visit and for your meaningful comments. It is easy to criticize and find fault but in the process we are hurting ourselves since the poison of our critical words returns back to us and hang around us like a dark cloud. That is why we should always think and say positive words so that we will surround our selves with positive energy and atmosphere. I will be linking you to my other blog since the edit page of this blog is out of order and I can no longer edit my blog roll here. God bless you and your family always.

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Hi Sameera,
Yes, it is so nice to view your beautiful face. I am an admirer of beauty and beautiful people. But I am an admirer more of beautiful souls. I am so glad that your soulmate has found you. I hope you will be forever in love with each other. I hope your life will be happy and you will accomplish your purpose in life. Thanks for your visit and your inspiring comments my beautiful friend. God bless you and your loved ones always. Have a great and peaceful day in Dubai. Smile always.

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Hi Unbalanced Libra,
Thanks for your visit and your comments. God bless you and your loved ones always.

c e e d y said...

I did put up a sorry comment on my blog and also emailed...but as you said pride prevented the person from accepting it - and also somehow the comment was not meant towards a specific person - but it was misunderstood....

there is only so much one can do...

thanks for the insight

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Hi Ceedy,
Sorry that I overlooked this comment. Sorry for the mistake my friend. The good thing is that you apologized and if he did not accpet your apology then you're already absolved of whatever liability you have from him/her. Let him/her stew in her own miserable spirit of bitterness and unforgiveness. Thanks for your visit and comments. God bless you always.

"Today, if you hear His voice, do not harden your hearts" (Hebrews 4:7b)


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